The holiday season is often depicted as a time of warmth, joy, and togetherness. But for many, it can also bring feelings of loneliness, grief, and stress. If the holiday season isn’t bringing you the joy it seems to bring everyone else, know that you're not alone—and that it's okay to feel this way. Here are some strategies to help you navigate the holidays and prioritize your mental health, along with resources that may provide comfort and guidance.
1. Acknowledge Your Feelings
It’s normal to feel a wide range of emotions during the holidays. You might experience sadness, anger, or even resentment as you watch others celebrate. Acknowledging these feelings rather than suppressing them can make a big difference. Allow yourself to grieve, process, or simply sit with how you feel. You don’t need to “force” yourself to be happy. The Healing Hearts Journal can be a great tool to help you process these complex emotions in a supportive way.
2. Set Boundaries and Respect Your Limits
Holiday gatherings can sometimes bring up memories or conversations that aren’t healthy for us. Set boundaries with yourself and others. Maybe you skip certain events, spend less time in gatherings, or choose the people you’re most comfortable around. It’s okay to say “no” or leave early if something doesn’t feel right. Letting go of “obligations” can be freeing.
3. Create Your Own Traditions
If traditional holiday activities are painful or don’t resonate with you, try creating new traditions that feel meaningful and positive. Consider an activity that brings you peace—such as spending a quiet evening with a good book, going for a nature walk, or volunteering. Small, personal rituals can add a comforting sense of meaning to the season.
4. Practice Self-Compassion
It’s easy to compare yourself to others during the holidays, especially when social media makes it seem like everyone else is having a perfect time. Remember that we don’t always see the full picture. Practice being kind to yourself. Avoid harsh self-judgment and remember that it’s okay if your holiday experience looks different.
For teens and tweens who may need extra guidance with self-compassion, the Healing Affirmation Journal for Teens and Tweens offers affirmations that help them reflect and build self-kindness.
5. Focus on the Present
Grounding yourself in the present moment can be a powerful tool when emotions feel overwhelming. Engage in mindful breathing, focus on small tasks, or even try journaling in the moment. Activities like these can help pull you out of worrying about things and redirect your focus to things within your control.
6. Reach Out and Connect in Ways That Feel Good to You
Even if the holidays feel lonely, you don’t have to go through them entirely alone. Connect with people who make you feel safe and seen, whether they’re family members, friends, or others in your support network. You might also explore online communities or support groups, where others may be experiencing similar emotions.
For children, the Exploring My Emotions Journal for Elementary School-Age Children can provide a gentle way to talk through feelings and build connections, even during times of stress.
7. Limit Exposure to Holiday Triggers
Certain holiday images, music, or traditions can evoke challenging emotions. Allow yourself to take breaks from environments or media that amplify these feelings. You can even create a “holiday-free zone” at home—a safe space that isn’t decorated or filled with seasonal reminders.
8. Practice Gratitude, But Only When It Feels Right
Gratitude can be a powerful tool for shifting perspectives, but only when it feels genuine. If you feel ready, try writing down a few things each day that you’re thankful for, even if they seem small. Remember, gratitude isn’t about invalidating your emotions; it’s about making space for hope, however small, even during tough times.
The Healing Affirmation Journal for Adults includes affirmations and prompts that gently encourage a grateful mindset, making it a valuable resource during the holidays.
9. Seek Professional Support if Needed
The holiday season can amplify struggles with mental health. If you feel that your emotions are too heavy to carry alone, consider reaching out to a therapist or counselor. Therapy can provide a space to process your feelings, understand your needs, and equip you with additional coping strategies.
Final Thoughts
If the holiday season doesn’t feel merry, remember that it’s okay to embrace it on your own terms. Taking things one day at a time, setting healthy boundaries, and finding small, meaningful moments for yourself can make a world of difference. This time of year doesn’t define you, and you are allowed to feel exactly as you do.
Helpful Resources for the Journey:
Exploring My Emotions Journal for Elementary School-Age Children: Perfect for children to identify and manage their emotions with supportive prompts.
Healing Hearts: A journal dedicated to processing difficult emotions with compassion.
Healing Affirmation Journal for Teens and Tweens: Provides affirmations and prompts to help younger individuals focus on self-compassion.
Healing Affirmation Journal for Adults: A journal that encourages reflection and self-affirmation for adults navigating complex feelings.
Here’s to finding peace, in whatever form it comes, and honoring your journey with kindness and self-care.
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Stay mindful and take care,
Tamera Foley, Ph.D.
Mending Minds and Healing Hearts
Education 4 All Now LLC
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